I'm very concerned because I've found my evil twin, and he's living in the same city as me!
A co-worker of Mommy's was walking by our friend Jenn's desk while she was checking out my blog, and he noticed that I look like his cat, Jesse! Of course, Mommy wanted to see pictures of 'Jesse' (if that is, in fact, his real name) to see how much he looks like me, and she agrees that he is my doppelganger.
I have to admit that he's a handsome fellow. He's even got one of my Sharpie dots in exactly the same spot. But friends, please don't be fooled by his gentle appearance - that's exactly what he wants!
Evil Samson's Dad claims that he's sweet, affectionate, great with his kids and an all around good cat, but if you're a Star Trek fan, you may remember an episode where Spock has an evil twin. The only difference in appearance was the telltale goatee. Evil Samson has a beard, which proves that he is from an alternate universe, and because I'm very good, he must be evil.
I'm worried that Evil Samson will use his charm and good looks to do harm. I hear he's already terrorizing and brutally murdering mice and chipmunks in his own neighborhood. Sweet and affectionate? Hardly! Although I do not have exposure to live mousies, I assure you that if I did, I would murder them with love and respect, not like the callous-hearted Evil Samson.
Who knows what Evil Samson may be planning? I want the world to know the subtle differences in our faces, so that if he tries to fool you into thinking he's me, you'll be aware of his trickery.
My best chance for defense from this horrible creature is the household 'muscle' Delilah, but when I tried to warn her about him, she dismissed me and said Evil Samson was 'kinda cute in a familiar way'. Obviously I cannot rely on her to help...
If you see Evil Samson, do not approach him! He is armed with incredible handsomeness and should be considered extremely dangerous.
My eyes are on him, and as soon as he makes the wrong move, I'll expose him for the vicious sociopath that he must truly be.